My partner is struggling and unwilling or unsure about seeking help. What do I do?

It can be challenging to support a partner* who may not be ready to access support (e.g., mental health professional).  Some individuals may be ambivalent about reaching out for help for various reasons (e.g., stigma, values, lack of time, fear, or lack of awareness).  

A few tips to help you navigate this experience 

• Have an open conversation about what you are observing and how this is impacting you;  
• Accept that your partner may not be ready at this time; 
• Listen and validate your partner’s emotions, try not to fix or go into problem-solving mode;  
• Encourage your partner to reach out to their natural supports (friends, family); 
• Ask your partner how they would like the topic to be discussed. This can inform future discussions in a way that is helpful for the partner that is experiencing challenges. 
• Focus on the things you can control by either prioritizing your self-care**, or connecting with a person who you can confide in.  
• Research services in your local area, so when your partner is ready you have resources at your disposal. For more information on services available, please contact MFS-NCR directly at: [email protected] 

* Please note that throughout the article, the term “partner” will be written as singular to facilitate the writing process. This does not exclude diverse forms of relationships (e.g., ethically non-monogamous).  

** Self-care is often summed up as “a hot bath, a glass of wine, and a book”. While this might be a healthy form of self-care for some, it is important to note that practicing self-care comes from within. Self-care is a practice that needs to make sense to the person who is engaging in it. The underlying idea of self-care practice is to enhance well-being and promote overall wellness (I.e., body, mind, and spirit).